The Sons - Goten After Dark
by Sath
Summary: A completely shameless take off a Simpsons episode but with definate Yaoi overtones... (only part 1/3 uploaded as yet)


The Sons - "Goten After Dark"  
  
Part 1 - Crime  
  
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Chichi decides to take a break from looking after Saiyan warriors all day and books a weeks holiday in a fancy hotel, but is it safe to leave Goku in charge at home....? We shall see...  
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Outside the Son family house Chichi was reeling off a huge list of dos and don'ts at her husband and son. Goku grinned his idiot grin, not really listening to his wife at all.  
"Sure.. uhuh.. no problem.. uhuh.. yeh.. and hang the chicken on the washingline, got it. Just leave it to me!"   
Chichi growled slightly in irritation and went to get in her Taxi. "And if anything happens, just use your best judgemmmm... just do what I would do."  
  
As the taxi pulled away, Goten grinned happily up at Goku and Goku grinned back.  
"A whole week! Just father and son!" Goku said blissfully. There was a momentary pause..   
"Well, see'ya at dinner dad."   
"Okay!"  
And so they parted ways until hunger brought them back together...  
Five minutes later they met again in the kitchen to raid the fridge. Well Saiyans will be saiyans, even more so when Chichi isn't there to wallop them with a frying pan.  
"Say dad?" Goten mumbled through a mouthful of food.  
"mmmmmhhmmnffm?" an even bigger stomach demanded a bigger mumble.  
"Where d'ya think mom gets her fryingpans from when they just seem to appear in her hand every time she gets mad?"  
Goku paused eating to allow his braincell's to function properly for a moment, he scratched his head thoughtfully. "Gee Goten, I don't know... maybe its a woman thing... mebbe Veget'll know, I should ask him next time we fu- ...uh... fight.."  
  
A day later in a park somwhere in Satan City, Dende was showing off his new remote-control capsule plane to Goten and Trunks.  
"Dende this is boooring!" Goten complained "Can't you make crash or something?!"  
Dende's only reply was to keep flying and state smugly; "Perfectly level flying is the supreme challenge of the scale model pilot."  
Trunks grabbed the remote from Dende in frustration and proceeded to show Dende how the thing was to supposed to be flown. The plane loop the looped all over the park and then Trunks began to show how even a saiyajin can have absolutely crud co-ordination skills as the plane went of at a complete Tangent to the other side of the park.  
  
On the other side of the park Piccolo and Gohan were enjoying a huge picnic (well Gohan was enjoying himself but Piccolo looked utterly miserable as usual).   
"I don't like being out in public, Gohan. For one thing there are too many fat children." remarked piccolo, just before a remote control plane bearing the CC logo flew past at high speed, nearly taking piccolo's turban off. Gohan didn't hesitate to throw himself across his sensei immediately in guesture of protection (nothing more.. of course...).  
  
The plane finally ended its great voyage by crashing on the roof of an old mysterious house on the edge of Satan City. In no time at all the two demi-saiyans and their little, green, pointy-eared friend were peering through a fence that bore a huge 'NO TRESPASSING' sign.  
"Thanks a lot!" wailed Dende sarcastically, "Now it's stuck on that haunted house!"  
"I heard a witch lives there!" said Goten in awe.  
"I heard an evil scientist lives there and he's creating the ultimate cyborg monster to come and kill us all!" exclaimed Dende  
"Not true," remarked Trunks cooly, "The Cell Saga finished ages ago we havent seen that witch woman since the Saiyan saga. Am I the only one that keeps up with the episodes around here?!"  
"Oh." Said the other two vaguely.  
Goten pondered ringing the doorbell but decided quickly that that would require intelligence so instead he decided to go get the plane back himself. He flew quickly up onto the roof, leaving the others outside trembling in fear. He quickly retrieved the plane and did a victory dance on the roof, and because this isn't U-rated, Goten did his victory dance with his pants down. (Trunks and dende drooling as they watched).  
  
"S-U-C-C-E-E-S!" Goten sang as he capered around on the roof wiggling his cute lil baby-butt at his admirers, "That's the way you spell succe...wa-aaaaaaah" Suddenly Goten slipped down the roof bumping into a gargoyle which only momentarily broke Goten's fall before unluckily it snapped off and fell to the ground, leaving Goten hanging from a gutter (Of course you see a plastic gutter is much sturdier than a solid rock gargoyle, but hey this is a cartoon!). So there Goten dangled with his pants down and his baby-dick for all the world to see, when suddenly a tickly caterpillar chose to walk across his fingers, and slowly Goten began to lose his grip and in a moment of classic Son-Family-Idiocy he forgot he could fly...  
"No, no! H-help, h-help!" he laughed as he was tickled and slipped, "I'm gonna die!"  
Goten fell to the ground crushing the Gargoyle beneath him and creating a huge crater with the weight of his awesome saiyajin stomach. The comotion he caused brough the attention of the lady of the house who stalked out looking uglier and more scary than Chichi, grabbed poor butt-naked Goten by his ear and dragged him off.  
"Oh no! The Witch has got Goten!" shrieked Trunks and Dende in a very girly and extremely camp manner as they fled the scene.  
  
Soon after, the scary old witch woman dragged Goten up to his front door by his ear and rang the bell.  
"Just a minute!" Came the muffled voice of Goku from the other side of the door. This was followed by a sound rather like a saiyajin warrior disentangling himself from a naked prince, and then the sound of paper tearing. Finally Goku opened the door, "Hey wow cool oh boy nice to meetcha." He said grinning.  
"Your son was trespassing on my property," the old lady complained, "and destroyed a very valuable stone gargoyle and... are you wearing a grocery bag?"  
Goku tried not to blush "I have misplaced my pants..." he said, trying to sound as intelligent as possible. (Big Fat F for you Goku!!! hahahaaa.. .oops back to the fic...)  
The old lady gives Goku a really wierd look but recovers quickly, "Well I expect you'll want to punish your son."  
Goku blinked "Well.. er I kinda dont think I can do that..." Goku scratched the back of his head, "Like er.. his SuperSaiyan Level 3.. I can't really punish him cos he's like invincible.. you know he defeated Cell!"  
"Well I'll just have to come back and have a word with his mother then!"  
"ARRGh no! no! Yeh I'll punish him!!! Don't tell ChiChi!!!" Goku wibbled in fear. "Yeh I'll punish him ! Dont come back alright!" Goku and Goten ran inside the house scared out their wits at the mention of ChiChi and slammed the door behind them.  
After taking a few deep breaths to calm down Goku turned to face Goten in the hallway.  
"Awww I don't know how to punish you... What does Chichi usually do?"  
"She makes me drink beer." Goten answered, using his best honest voice and puppy dog eyes.  
Goku for once was not to be convinced that easily, "Come on squirt, give me a little credit.." Unhappily for Goku, his makeshift grocery bag clothing chose that moment to have the bottom fall out of it. A whole Chicken, two bananas, a gay porno mag and a bottle of K-Y-Jelly thudded to the floor at his feet.  
/Yeh take you seriously riiiiight.../ thought Goten.  
"Hey Kakarott if you want the brat punished you should just let me smash his face in!" Yelled a familiar voice from the front room.  
Goten peered round his father and tried to get a look into the front room, "hey.. dad is that Vegeta?!"  
Goku edged over and shut the door so Goten couldn't see, "No...its er.. its the plumber.. we had a leaky pipe.. yeh.. see we did.."  
"So.. why was he naked...?"  
  
(insert really annoying but narator-saving 'End of Chapter' sign here.. mwahahahaa!)  
  
Well if you're still awake, see if you can stay awake till I can get part 2 finished! ha! 


End file.
